I grew up in a very strict religous household. A few of the concepts drummed into my head contained the message that the "flesh was evil." To counteract that evil, our bodies were covered carefully. We were not allowed to wear shorts or sleeveless shirts. And we were prepared to live the "gospel teachings."
In this picture, I am about 24 years old. I truly believed that you could divide your spirit from your body so that you were not contaminated by the corruption of the flesh.
As I grew away from the religion of my youth, I started the quest of "who is Cynthia?" I travelled the world with the U.S. Navy. I met my husband. I learned to drink coffee, wine, and beer. I began to see that the world was not completely corrupt.
This picture was taken in Panama when I was thirty or so. Even then I truly thought that we were divided into body, mind, and spirit. Wrong. Wrong...
It was after I became ill in Germany and my life started to slip away from me that I learned the truth. The body houses the brain. It is the brain that controls the mind. Without a healthy body, I could not learn, remember, or create. I lost me.
Another truth I learned was that my body was not an unhappy little child that needed to be disciplined. My body is me.
Today after many medications and treatment options, which included dialysis, I.V. chemotherapy, and prednisone, I can walk, read, and talk. I can write. I can cook, sleep, and breathe. But, mostly I am one with my body. And, my body is one with me.
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
18 comments:
Very nice, Cynthia. :)
Thank you Lynn ...
Beautifully put - i am understanding more and more what life's like for you and what it was like in the past - no wonder you're such a strong person, having to work through all that.
Hi Cynthia,
Good thing you figured it all out.
Bad concepts taught for
truth...ugh!
Hope you are having a good day.
oh my how insightful. i should print your words and place them close to me to read often. you spoke of something i need to hear once in a while. thank you friend.
btw you were a hottie and still are my sweet.
Moving. But do I buy it?
St. Francis called his body, rather grudgingly, "Brother Ass." He thought it an imposition upon his spiritual life.
My body is my incarnation but I would not say my body is me, although I agree that consciousness exists in the brain and can be destroyed while the vegetative functions of the body continue. If there is a soul, it's "in" the brain, in so much we agree.
I'm dying to know which strict sect you were brought up in.
chiefb... thank you... well, it was not easy. I have really enjoyed my life more after I left home.
Belle.. yes, there are a lot of "truth" out there that is NOT what it seems. :-) thank you for the compliment... I had no self-confidence in those days. And, I was really really shy.
Chaffin... I guess we agree to disagree... I did find out through the last three years that w/o the proper function of my brain that I was not me. I am still trying to understand if my personality is a construct... or a separate spirit/soul... hard to know when you are in the inside. :-)
This post made me cry. But that was a good cry. I needed it.
Hugs!
Misty
Thank you Misty...
What a terrific post. Mormonism puts at at war with our bodies, so we're never whole. I'm glad you found yourself. I have too.
JLO.. true...
I wonder if this type of stress can cause illness. A thought.
I can relate, as I am seeing now that the brain controls it all and not our testimonies of what we are told to believe. My wife's family is from Casrson, I love it up there. AZexpositor
AZ.. Hi there...thanks for coming by. Yes, we love it up here. My hubby is a NON... so when I get a little crazy, he calms me down. LOL
Thanks for the excellent post!
Nothing like a bit of illness to make one very aware your dependence on your body...
By the way - great photos!
Thank you endment. :-)
The first photo was taken at my dojo ( they had a professional photographer). The second photo was taken by my husband. He seems to be the only one to get the real me.
And illness shows us (in stark relief) our weaknesses.
To be really happy within one's own body is a true accomplishment!! Congrats~
Sounds like your hubby is an awesome partner!
Just one... He has helped me through some very hard times (my illness). He has such a practical outlook of life. Just what I need.
:-)
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